Wednesday, November 30, 2005

...on antichrists

...or on anarchists

well what d'ya know. the sex pistols are getting inducted into the rock and roll hall of fame. the bastard doesn't quite know how to feel about it. ahhhhhhh fuck it. i know how i feel. i never really did like the idea of the rock and roll hall of fame. since the dub IS more of a fan of it than i, at least the bastard can sleep soundly knowing that there will be debate and that's truly what's important. but i digress, i never liked the idea of putting a bunch of displays in effing ohio and calling it the place to go to see what it was all about . this rock and roll thing, this youth culture thing. god, it's in fucking cleveland. isn't that the city spinal tap was lost backstage in? hellllllllloooooooooo cleveland! look i don't care what all the little chicks with the crimson lips say about cleveland rocking, i ain't dating them, so i don't value their opinion on things. they could have at least built the damn place in detroit. but then who wants to go to detroit? ida know.

i never really like the idea of it, music is a state of mind, not a place you visit, i could go on about the exp music place in seattle too but that guy from microsoft has to spend his money on something. i have an idea. knock down the exp music project and buy me a frikkin house. nothing fancy, just something off the main drag. anyway, i am also really ambiguous about the whole nomination process, i find all things of this nature as inherently slanted usually has folks that are desperately out of touch in charge of it. i still maintain that sinead o connor should have won best female grammy for the lion and the cobra over tina turner's private dancer. the album had been out for 2 years and tina didn't even put anything out that year. and don't get me started about the whole jethro tull/metallica thing. that's a bit of a sore spot around the dinner table, you know. the other thing is, the rock and roll hall of fame may eventually get to everyone but and the bastard hates to play "moving the goal post" with them but there will always be a more relevant act than who is nominated that year. let me ask you this, do you think the bad brains would ever be nominated into the rock hall. they are quite possibly one of the greatest/underrated punk acts and they are not even a foot note. you know what the bastard's dream is? i always had this about Pil and the grammys. and i imagined that upon receiving such an award john lydon would go up on stage, beat the presenter to death with the award and then proceed to draw himself a pint out of adam curry's skull (or perhaps that corpse kurt loder) while shouting "exterminate, exterminate" at the top of his lungs. steve jones would follow up by calling downtown julie brown a "dirty fuckah". glen matlock would of course be a frikkin' ponce, as he IS a frikking ponce. anyway, that's what keeps me warm at night.

i have similar feelings about about black sabbath being nominated because their fat sound is just too big for the room. i feel that their very presence will cause the very auditorium to instantly grow great fields of wheelchair in the aisles. chuck norris will somehow be involved. don't worry it'll be good, and there will be plenty of roundhouse kicks and that dog from the black sabbath cartoon....doom doom. now go drink coffee, jerkface.

—the bastard

4 comments:

bigbromofo said...

bastard

great cartoon of sabbath. i cant wait for ozzy to fall down on stage or curse live to teh audience. i hope they play something other than iron man at the gig, maybe sabbath bloody sabbath or snowblind, or fairies wear boots.

i think you do not like the hall becassue in teh scheme of things once again JP will beat IM to the hall. Screaming, Screaming for vengeance.

dub plat hellion

bigbromofo said...

the drummer looks like carmine appice more than bill ward. where did you get that from anyway.

dub plat and the union gap

bastard central said...

i don't like the hall because it's window dressing a puff piece, i could give two craps about what band goes where and when they get in.

the cartoon actually is from robert smigel's tv funhouse that ran on comedy central. i actually HAVE the cartoon to watch. it's really funny. and quite like in the cartoon, i hope that they play hand of doom.........rockin'

i really can't picture iron maiden in a display next to the ink spots. do they set it up by genre or in alphabetical order because that, like cleveland does NOT rock.

—b

bastard central said...

i also hope to see bill ward take bongf hits from a volcano like in the sabbath cartoon.......back to you 3k?