so the bastard doesn't like talking about doing his business. but, i walk into my "office" to do my "business" when someone asks from the other stall,
"hey man, do you have a spare roll of toilet paper overe there? the roll over here is soaking wet"
so the bastard does his rate best to give him a goddam roll so i can put this unpleasant incident behind me (HAH. behind GET IT?! ahhhh, go to hell) but it doesn't stop there,
"thanks man, i don't know how the roll over here got all soaking wet man. thanks"
"SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!" the bastard is now sufficiently creeped out. carry on. GO ON! carry on.