Friday, October 13, 2006

...on abbreviations

"so i was figuring that we'd have dinner with the chairman on sunday night"

"when the hell are you going home, mofo?"

"oh. monday."

"ok"

"so i was thinking we meet up with the chairman on sunday"

"you want sushi"

"i want to talk business"

"well natch", i retort.

"i just figured that we could all....did you just say natch?"

"ummm, yeah. i did"

just then the mofo, lifts his middle finger and sticks it right in my face. "you realize that you now speak like you text people"

"you know i think you're right", the bastard responds. "i've been abbreviating alot lately."

"yeah, it took me a couple minute before i figured out what the hell you meant by 'deets'."

came home from dropping the mofo off at his friends house and stopping by the garage to pick up some gear, i park in the sweet spot (one of these days, i'll get into the sweet spot, the bad block, and the ludicrous parking location system the nice lady and i devised so that we could locate the car at various points in time), and on my way back to the apartment, i see this car, with this plate. there you go shiteyes...natch.

—the bastard

6 comments:

Damnation Mistress said...

ok so I've been sitting here a while trying to firgure out just what 'natch' is. it doesn't help that my glasses are hiding from me. I really don't know if I've gone with the right abbreviation.

dm

bastard central said...

oh you've got "natch" right. it's really a phonetic spelling of the abbreviation for "naturally". "nat" just doesn't seem to get the same sound across.

—b

Damnation Mistress said...

egads... and you talk/txt like that. (shakes head walks off scared and bewildered)

I do see ur point though.

dm

bastard central said...

moreso texting with the texting than the talking but then again i'll actually text words like "apparently". i also spell check my texts. hey wait! your making fun!

—b

Damnation Mistress said...

me make fun? never...

... ok maybe a little...

... bah screw it I don't understand serious.

dm

bastard central said...

well a little is always fine. hell, alot is better when the situation calls for it.

—b