Wednesday, August 15, 2007

the wrong trousers

every girl's crazy bout a sharp dressed man. or maybe everyone gets crazy when a man has sharps. ida know but, the bastard has to tell you something. he carries a shiv on him. in fact, i own several. alot of them are made by spyderco. i highly recommend the brand should you need something sharp. i even bought one for the chairman. and i've already gotten a decent look at the next one i'm going to buy.

but i digress.

anyway, all branding aside, the bastard stopped into the coffee-a-teria on the way home. now mind you i didn't go home last night and since yesterday's jeans were nice and soda encrusted, i had to buy a pair of jeans as well and all my gear didn't fit into the pockets as well as my soda pants so every time i have to take my wallet out of my pocket, i have to take this monstrosity which is one of my favorite shivs. so while i was in coffee-a-teria i made sure to take out enough to buy my coffee beforehand. upon arriving, a young hispanic man takes my order and when he gives me the price which tells me that the price of things has gone up to my disdain. so out comes the shiv and i clomp it onto the counter. the young man's eyes bug out. i look him in the eye and tell him with a grin, "these are the wrong pants for this knife". he grins back and takes my money. i grin and take my coffee.

—the bastard

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