...on closing

"pardon me?"

"pardon me"

"pardon ME"

"or just don't move and stand there like an asshole"

this is how the bastard started his evening and he said this to the COO of what we can call the NEW company. yes, the music was blaring. no, he didn't react. and goddam right, i feel foolish for opening my mouth.

so the morning starts with me forgetting shit, going back to the apartment, and other inconveniences. but the train ride had me rethinking everything that has gone wrong with the bastard up until this point. and as i was, the train was filling up more and more. it felt like the walls were closing in as more people got on. by the time i got to lex i had a handle on it but it was still there, nagging.


standing on the 6 platform, waiting for the transfer and the platfrom is empty. i forgot to mention that the bastard is running late and i must have missed the last train of rush hour and coming down the tube was the first train of the non rush hour.

just waiting for the green light.

just waiting to happen.

when this homeless man in a wheelchair who made me think of david was, was wheeling his way down the platform with all of his gear attached to the chair. he wasn't crippled, he was just in a wheelchair. i mean, his legs work as they were his mean of locomotion.

time stops.

green light.

time starts again.

and i'm on the 6. it's empty. almost surreal because i'm tired, it's empty and i was so crowded before. and so not in a good place. but david was was wheeling himself onto the train with me and he backs into the door that will open at 42nd.

pull into 42nd, and only one door opens and this guy can't get out. 2 or 3 people try to help him get out about to no avail. he ain't getting out. david was rolls forward and let's the door close. smiles. shrugs it off. it's not like he had an appointment to keep. and all of a sudden, things didn't seem so bad. so i got better. and then i made coffee. now i'm right with the world. now if the COO didn't really hear me, shit'll be golden.

—the bastard