Monday, May 21, 2012

turnstile

the bastard has a sliding scale of moral relevance when it comes to theft…

if you're gonna steal a car…

steal a fly ride but don't break my windows to steal the linzer tarts off of the console.

if your gonna shoplift…

you best work for the store you're stealing from because fuck the man.

if your gonna steal candy…

best not to steal from a baby because that shit will wreck my review of you on yelp.

and of you're gonna jump the turnstile…

show some balls and jump the goddam turnstile.

don't be like that middle aged lady waiting on the side with a Louis Vuitton bag or knockoff of said brand…

waiting for someone to hit the emergency exit.

I see you.

we all see you you frikkin grifter.

you don't look like you're eating catfood.

you have a Louis Vuitton bag or knockoff of said brand…

buy a damn metro card like the rest a us rubes.

cheapskate.

—the bastard

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