Wednesday, September 14, 2005

worst morning ever

well it couldn't be the "worst" morning ever, no one died.

it all started at 12:30 am when i was wrapping up for bed. now i never wanted to start a weekly karaoke thing but now i have a new hobby, the stupid bastard in the cadillac. yes the identity of the "la cucaracha" horn has been identified as one stupid q. stereotype. he's older than my grandfather would be if he were alive and he dresses like he's part of the ensemble cast of the sopranos (standard uniform of the tuesday night karaoke people) and has a gigantic diamond encrusted cross. yes you heard it right. the bastard will now stalk this man and make him my hobby. he was parked under my son's window and when no one acknowledged his kitchy horn honk, he did it a second time. how no one could see this old ass man who should be ashamed of himself and his behavior. besides i find it impossible that no one saw him with that medallion he was rocking. i think there were people in suffolk county that were wonderring why there was a giant cross on the horizon. i hope he dies real soon because he WILL be a weekly fixture on this blog if i have my way. the bastard doesn't like to have to shout out his window it wakes up the boy (which it did) and makes the bastard want to break the law.

anyway, i get up at 6:30 water the plants and bash the back of my head on the window coming in to find the boy sacked out on the couch looking for noggin and a glass of juice which he proceeds to dump on the floor by accident which of course gets the bastard speaking fast and cross, thus making the boy cross. we get in the car and it's alternate side of the street day making an already sparse parking situation worse. so long story short, the bastard had to drive his battered crumpled ride home (school is halfway point of my walk to the train every morning) just so i can park it and walk to the train. god decides to fianlly let me off the hook at roosevelt avenue by letting me vic a seat. i am so bloody tired.

—the bastard

2 comments:

Anonymous said...
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bastard central said...

hi,

i'm a robot. i am designed to say something "really great" aboutr your blog and then leave alink about my tai chi website. or my debt relief website. or some other crap. fear not dub, the bastard is mulling whether or not word verification will be warrented on his works.

—b