Friday, March 21, 2008

has the bastard ever told you...

...hell is travelling with other people.

okay, so the bastard has yet to enmass the kind of wealth to buy a jet and have a carbon footprint like al gore's house.

which reminds me, when has a Nobel prize ever been awarded on television featuring music by melissa etheridge? if that ain't media bias, the bastard doesn't know what is.

but I digress, hell is travelling with other people. try to keep up stupid. it all started out when the bastard discovered eastern european gangsters on line with him. and they litter too. I guess vigo mortensen was totally off the mark because he didn't toss his empties on the frikken ground instead of the handy trash recepticle 5 feet away. I guess be didn't want to tip off the tsa by having a loaded empty bottle of water.

in out next thrilling episode, the bastard drowns out women who finish all sentences in question form with the velvet underground. it begs the question of what's worse, enduring two asian girls with oily skin yammer on about boys and otaku or a tone deaf german chanteuse warbling about all tomorrows parties (which was a hell of a book). my money is on nico. at least she didn't look all shiny from eating too many potato chips, just tranked out from too much heroin.

-the bastard


Anonymous said...

Enough about the bastard and his problems. We need more chairman and bobble updates. Their hijinx are the funniest.

bastard central said...

if the bastard has told you once, he's told you a thousand times, if you don't submit, you must acquit.

oh, wait that was johnny cochrane

look at the wookie, look at the funny wookie