Wednesday, December 31, 2008

wind up

well, this might be the only chance the bastard gets to do this before one more crisis hits us before the year is out so here goes.

this year the bastard won for a change.

he got to see some magic. and he got to hear the phrase that pays.

the chairman fired a fuck ton of guns.

the bastard found out how to get in touch with god.

the chairman had soem bad dreams that apparently come in threes.

the bastard went to court.

scoop came back to the east by car. and then she moved to florida.

the boy came to town and educated new yorkers on how to use the bathroom.

i drank some beer. nothing new there.

we had an election. the chairman's friend in denver covered the convention for me. the bastard really hopes he's wrong about the next 4 years.

the bastard finally outlasted the restaurant that had caused him so much grief over the last 8 years. and now i'm gonna leave because hey, i won.

the machine came to life and the bastard has been riding it ever since.

i got engaged, and then my ladyfriend went to iowa on business.

the crew went camping.

the bastard had hisself another indoor flood.

that said, it wasn't too bad a year, except for all the flooding. but it's like this, i got a promotion last month. it was the biggest promotion i ever got in my whole career. i didn't want to arrive in this chair in the way i did but, i'm in the chair of a newsstand magazine again and i'm going to make the most of it. i'm going to make the most of it because the bastard has been really lucky in life. yeah, i've had some tragedy and i keep getting up to do it again. as long as i can keep doing it again.

see you next year jerks.

—the bastard

When I was young and they packed me off to school
and taught me how not to play the game,
I didn't mind if they groomed me for success,
or if they said that I was a fool.
So I left there in the morning
with their God tucked underneath my arm --
their half-assed smiles and the book of rules.
So I asked this God a question
and by way of firm reply,
He said -- I'm not the kind you have to wind up on Sundays.
So to my old headmaster (and to anyone who cares):
before I'm through I'd like to say my prayers --


TW said...

I want to know why everytime I post something new that jawa dude keeps getting in on top of me on the sidebar there?

WTFF! Relation means nothing in these tubes of blogisphere.

By the way, I made the Wind Up comment before reading this, I'm psychic, except, apparently, when trying to determine how to beat that Jawa motherfucker to the top.

bastard central said...

the blogroll is set to put whover updated last first. nuthin personal

Rob S. said...

Happy New Year, Bastard. Let it roll.